Am I normal? Am I sane?
I’m all mixed up. What do I gain?
Why can’t I think? Why do I hurt?
I shake and shudder. I feel like dirt.
Why do I feel the way I do?
My head is splitting. I wish I knew.
My hands are shaking. My chest is tight.
What must I do to end my plight?
I know the good times. I know the bad.
Why must I always feel this sad?
Why can’t I cry? Why can’t I shout?
I just can’t see what it’s all about.
Why do I hope? What do I fear?
The answer’s far. I want it near.
My love is clear. My hope is strong.
Why can’t I work out what is wrong.
I’m not stupid. I’m pretty bright.
But I can’t work out what to fight.
Why do I sweat when I am cold?
Please someone tell me. I feel so old.

©Anthony W. Pahl
02 June 1993

For more poetry and stories from Australian Vietnam Veteran, Anthony W. Pahl
Anthony Pahl's Websites
http://iwvpa.net/pahlaw/index.php